On certainties..or the lack of

I received news last Thursday from the WUSC office that the original placement I applied for has been put on hold. The email ended with "Sorry about that, but these are realities of working in the field of international development." So now I must pick a new placement. My brain started to fill with thousands of questions. What do I do about my research? I don't even know which country I'm going to now. I can't get my immunizations yet. I can't have my ticket booked yet. And people keep asking where I'm going!

Look at how I'm so used to certainties in life. I recall the many stories I have heard previously about children being pulled out from school because of various reasons - parents ran out of money to pay school fees, parents fell sick so they must stay home to take care of siblings, family is having a bad season and need another pair of hands to help out on the field...and the list goes on. I tried to picture myself in those situation. I imagined myself going home one day and was told that I could no longer go to school tomorrow, imagined myself turning on the tap and no water came out, imagined myself not finding food in the house and that's it - there is no grocery store where I can go to pick up more food. All of a sudden,  life seems to mean something different altogether. Everyday we expect some kind of order and consistency to our life. Everyday we take that for granted.

Then I recall when Rebecca from the Working Centre said, "I grew up at a place which I thought was not structured, but at the Ugunja Community Centre, there is really no structure."

I can already picture myself losing patience without a plan, without knowing what to expect today, tomorrow, next week... I am looking forward to have my life turn upside down and be taught all over again what life could mean.